Tag Archives: distance

Missing Out

Living away from family and friends is tough sometimes. There’s always a lot of good things, right, but the long and short of it is: you’re missing out. And so are they, in a way.

It’s only the distance, right?
I’m so far away from all the messes
– make my own –
so far away from all
the cancer and the ugly truths
– have ’em here too –
so far away from daily struggles
– it’s snowing here –
so far away from home

It’s funny how I call it that
home – as if
I’m missing your theater tryouts
and the fact that there’s a new teacher
at my old high school
– new teachers for me too –
the fact that you’re still riding everyday
– I miss my bike –
the fact that dinners and our tiny
three-bedroom house for five
– I’ve got two –
look so much flatter on the screen

Did I mention that it’s winter here?
No, not outside – it’s winter
in the way it’s not the rain
– we all precipitate –
It’s winter in the books that
are still left on the shelf, unread
– they’re lonely –
in the way that I can live alone now
unencumbered, also empty
– cook my own meals and everything –
It’s winter in the treats I bake on weekends
cause an introvert
– that’s me –
is so much better left alone

Did I mention moving out?
It means living in your own head
– you miss my art –
living in a space so undefined
– and what about your oil pastels? –
living in a winter house so white
you’re missing out
– your nursing books and
push-up runs and
those fun evening videos –
living in anticipation
of the day when I come home again

M.
Oct 20/15

Distance

Day one of my first series, and I’m already behind… sounds about right. Anyways, here’s last week’s poetry: a piece that explores how hard it is to be away from the people you love. Expats, college kids, and newly-moved-out folks, this is for you.

Distance

I sit here.
I only talk to you
– I sit here,
staring at the
cracks in the ceiling,
those black memories
we made fall when
I sit here,
no longer remembering
no longer privy to
this daily ache inside
and when
I sit here
I just think because
I’m all alone
and you can’t hear
the thoughts I send your way
the thoughts I try
to send your way
and now
I sit here –
I’m not comfortable
and this precious life
I’m living feels
so loud like I’m alive
and still
I sit here
and I think and say
no words because
the silence makes me feel
that when
I sit here
I’m surrounded by
the thoughts you send
my way when

you just sit there
and you think of me

M.
Sep 28/15